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the hour has come: or, on christian marriage

Several conversations, of late, have circled around what I think about Christian marriage -- particularly in relation to divorce.  In order to know what what's dying, I maintain, you have to know what's been living.  Sadly, this just simply isn't true for lots of Christians.  Having inherited some really sloppy philosophical commitments from Medieval Aristotelianism, we have a bad ontology of love and marriage.  But I don't intend to wax academic here.  Instead, I want to offer a reflection on what Christian marriage actually is.

That said, this is a fine place to offer an article I submitted earlier this week for a publication.

Let me know what you think.

I've placed the article beneath the break.



Perhaps one of the better joys as a minister is to bless and sanctify the marriage of a couple before God. There are always reasons I find to read St John’s story of Jesus at the wedding of Cana found in John 2.1-11. The first creation account in Genesis builds carefully through the different pairs: Heaven and earth, light and dark, sun and moon, sea and dry land, animals and plants, and finally humans, part of creation yet standing over against the rest of creation as God’s image-bearers, God’s under-gardeners – and themselves divided, as are the animal and plant kingdoms, into the ultimate complementary pairing, male and female. John’s gospel is all about the marriage of heaven and earth in Jesus Christ. That is the final purpose of God in creation – not the separation of heaven and earth but their wonderfully fruitful combining. And it is that coming together of the complementary God-given pairings that we celebrate in the marriage of a man and a woman.

Right off the top, we Christians must confess that the joyful and mutual love of a man and a woman isn’t just some curious social convention. Marriage is a sign of what God intends for the entire creation.

Maybe that’s why marriage seems so difficult, and yet so full of potential. Make no doubt about it, John’s little story demonstrates all the ways that a wedding can go wrong. The awkwardness and embarrassment. But the embarrassment of that wedding day mirrors the blushing of Adam and Eve, hiding from God in the garden, a couple gone wrong, a fault symbolized by wrong eating now being put right by a redemption symbolized by right drinking. Jesus’ changing of water into wine is designed to say, not just to this couple whose day was about to be ruined but to the wider world, to you and me, to the whole creation, It’s all right! It’s going to be OK!

The life-long self-giving that is a Christian marriage is meant to mirror God’s unbreakable commitment to a creation that sees so many things go wrong. This is why, at the end of John’s story, the bride got the wine, the bridegroom got the compliments, and Jesus got the glory. That’s how it should be. Christian marriage is the mystery at the heart of creation itself, because it is nothing less than a demonstration of the mystery of God’s love for that creation, a mystery we see take form and live among us in Jesus Christ. Marriage is a signpost for the rest of the world that God’s love may be demonstrated in the largest endeavor we humans can make together. The hour has come. God has kept the best wine till now. Marriage is that time when we eat, drink, and take in that love with one another.